I was dropping off a patient at one of the local ERs a few days ago. I was still waiting in triage when another crew came in behind me. I have known the paramedic on that crew for years. I have even run a few ugly scenes with him and have always considered him to be a top notch provider. He was bringing in a patient of obvious Middle Eastern decent who was complaining of flu-like symptoms. We began to chat while we were waiting for the nurse to find a room for us. We were catching up on old times and telling stories.  Later I was at the EMS desk finishing my paperwork when he came up beside me with his laptop computer.

“I hate ragheads,” he said nonchalantly.

“Come again,” I said still looking at my clipboard. What do you say to something like that? I guess I was hoping that I heard him wrong, but I knew I was going to hear something stupid that would ruin my opinion of him.

“I hate fucking ragheads. Back in the day, when I was in the army, I got to blow them away. I miss it.”

“Whoa, easy there partner. Having a rough day are we?” I looked up from my clipboard just for a second and quickly went back to what I was doing. Unfortunately these conversations are all too common. I used to try and engage these people a bit. But over the years I have learned that I am just a small and insignificant boy trying to put my finger in a dike that holds back a sea of hatred. Now I just play it cool, trying to make it obvious that I do not have the same viewpoint, but also making light of it and making it obvious that I do not want to engage in debate about it.

“What, are you one of those types that voted for Obama and wants to sing Kumbaya with all the ragheads?” he said.

I wanted to say, “Yes, I voted for Obama. And my sister-in-law is Pakistani. She and her whole family are doctors who have come to the United States, achieved a lot more than you or me and most of the native inhabitants of this place, and it is a shame that such nice productive people that have earned citizenship and pay their taxes have to have public servants like you who hate them because of the color of their skin.” That’s what I wanted to say. That’s the kind of thing that I used to say. (See reason #138 why people in Kentucky do not get along with me.) But I have learned that it is impossible to change the view of one person during the course of one conversation. Engaging these people in debate only leads to a horrid work environment, so I just blow it off unless I hear this kind of garbage coming from a co-worker that I have to deal with on a daily basis. What I really said was, “Alrighty then. Before you go off killing a bunch of people you may want to cut down on your caffeine intake.” He got the point and we just left it at that.

This post is for all of the non-EMS people who read this blog. This is for the civilians who look up to their public servants. The point I want to get across to you is that THIS IS COMMON. This guy’s attitude did not phase me a bit, and the way I dealt with it was well rehearsed because it is almost a daily occurrence. I hear this from soldiers, EMS, fire, and police. I have heard this in Texas, and Kentucky. This viewpoint is so common that people like this knuckle dragging moron are comfortable expressing graphic opinions of hatred to people they are barely acquainted with because it hardly ever goes unchallenged. THIS IS THE NORM. At least it is for the line of work I am in and this income bracket. So there. I said it. I just thought I would lay that on the table.

Is everyone in public service like this? No. Of course not. But as I have said, this mindset is so common that these people feel comfortable spewing this hatred to strangers and light acquaintances. It is one of the things that gets me down about my profession.

I have had a lot of soldiers in my classes over the years and they are one of the worst about this. Their opinions are graphic. They talk with relish about “killing sand-niggers” and “stupid fucking ragheads.” They make no bones about the fact that the people they are there to kill are evil, and the people they are trying to help are no better.

I got into a student’s face one time after using all the racial slurs listed above and more during a loud conversation in my classroom, “So why did you join the army?”

“What? What do you mean.”

“Okay, let’s put that aside a minute. What was your mission while you were overseas? What was the purpose for you risking your life?”

“Well, we were helping the Iraqi people.”

“Okay, but by your own admission, they are just a bunch of stupid ‘ragheads.’ So, do you think the mission was a waste of your time?”

“No. We probably did some good.”

“Okay. But you don’t think that those people are capable of taking care of themselves. You don’t feel a burning desire to help them make their lives better. Because you hate them all.”

He was starting to get uncomfortable. “Well I don’t hate them all, but yes I do think that helping them was a big waste of time.”

“I assume you were not drafted into the military. We haven’t had a draft since before you were born,” I stated. “Why did you volunteer to RISK YOUR LIFE for a bunch of people in a foreign land that you have no respect for?”

My question was met with silence.

“Common, man. You went out of your way to sign up for a low paying, life threatening job? You VOLUNTEERED to go overseas, stayed in the hot-ass desert, and got shot at so that you could altruistically help your fellow man? Damnit man, are you a freaking saint or suicidal?”

Again there was a long period of silence.

“Or did you go over there to shoot at brown people because you wanted to feel important and get your fill?”

Silence.

“That’s what I thought. I would like to personally thank you for your service to this country. Since you went and risked your life to free the Iraqi people and help them find Democracy, you are to be congratulated. Now you are entering a career of public service, and you will be representing our paramedic program while you are in this classroom and while you participate in hospital clinicals and your ambulance ride time. While you are acting as a student of this program you will never use racial slurs or be hateful to any group of people. If I ever find out that you have, you will be removed from this program. I suggest that if you want to be successful in this endeavor as well as others that you take that hatred of yours and hide it deep down where no one will ever find it. Take a seat.”

Now don’t get me wrong. I support our troops. That’s the big buzzword, isn’t it? In America you need to support the troops no matter what side of the war argument you are on. And I do. I support all of the troops that signed up for duty to defend our country and help the Iraqi people. It is my understanding that there are many people who fit that description and are worthy of praise and admiration. There are even folks like my good friend who went overseas for personal reasons and learned that there was more to the mission than met the eye. I support and thank those people as well.

But to anyone who may be reading this who thinks that the entire military establishment is one big homogeneous altruistic bunch of selfless do-gooders bent on risking their own lives for low pay simply to defend our freedoms…well…I have news for you. To anyone who thinks that all EMTs, paramedics, fire fighters, and cops are all wonderful selfless people that your kids should look up to and admire…well…think again.

I once had to give a written statement about an EMT we had recently hired who wanted to do nothing but examine patient’s private parts. I once had a partner who believed she was a Wiccan priestess and she used to chant while holding crystals while I drove code three. I also had a partner who believed that all women should be subservient to men, believed in polygamy, and would regularly speak Klingon to nursing home patients. I could go on for a while but I think I will stop here.  All the wackos I have ever had to work with pale in number to the amount of hateful, prejudice people that go out of their way to treat other ethnicities with less respect than their own. I do not condemn the whole military. I do not condemn the whole pre-hospital work force. But all of these blanket arguments I have heard about blindly supporting your public servants and the military are simply misinformed. All the talk I have heard about racism in America coming to an end just because of the election of a black president is preposterous.

Again, to all of you who diligently serve your communities and your country, you have my heart-felt thanks. To all of you who have other motives, what I have to say to you cannot be spoken here.

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